Understanding the Two Different Sides of Love

Skyscrapers are amazing feats of engineering. They need to be strong enough to resist the forces that come against them, like gravity and wind. That’s why skyscrapers are built with steel.

They also need to be flexible enough to withstand the forces that come against them … like gravity and wind. That’s why architects design skyscrapers with a certain amount of sway.

Strength and softness. The two sides of a superstructure. Two sides of love as well.

Jesus loves us with softness and strength. He’s the Lion of Judah. He’s also the Lamb of God. When Peter told Jesus not to go to the cross, Jesus responded with strength. He confronted Peter, telling him, “Get behind me Satan” (Matthew 16:23). When He encountered the woman at the well, He engaged her with softness (John 4:1-26).

Strength and softness are the model for love in marriage and in parenting. To balance them, you need some sway. People with strong personalities need the flexibility to soften. And people with soft personalities need the flexibility to be stronger, to have better boundaries, and to be more willing to confront wrong.

But how do you learn to be softer when you naturally lean toward toughness? And how do you learn to be stronger when you’re naturally more passive and laid back?

Dr. John Trent is joining us on our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Understanding the Two Different Sides of Love” to share the differences between strong and soft love and how they manifest in marriage, family, and other relationships. He also explains how to love others better by developing qualities you may be lacking.

Listen to our conversation on your local radio stationonline, on Apple Podcasts, via Google Podcasts, or take us with you on our free phone app.

You may also be interested in the book Dr. Trent co-authored with the late Dr. Gary Smalley called The Two Sides of Love: How to Strengthen and Balance Your Relationships. We’d like to send you a copy for a gift of any amount. Visit our website or give us a call at 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459). If you can’t afford it, we’ll find a way to get it to you.

We also have many other resources related to marriage, parenting, and faith available in our online store.

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Jim Daly

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